31st March
Ok, today is the 31 of March. Looks like some significant but to me, it is nothing commemerable. I really feel very unhappy that this fateful day have to finally arrive.
It seems like I have been waiting for this day to come, just the thought of it alone pains me. But it is needed, at least its what and how I assure myself. For with pain comes great accomplishment. This pain is needed to mould me into somebody in the future with greater results. I really hate to say this but this path I've choosen for myself, I know I've made the right choice but it really isn't something easy to accept.
Well, today is the day I've to delete my warcraft from my computer. I know, many will say that small little stuffs like that wont matter and definetely would not hurt you at all. You know, they are wrong. To me, games are not just a form of entertainment, not anymore, they are a form of stress relieve, a way of life ( maybe not), a cycle whereby when it stops, life will feel so restless.
I know I do not have a choice, for I've already laid this path well and steady for myself and even if the days and beholds me lies danger and terror, I would have to face it because I know, with it, I would eventually be able to stand proudly on my feet because I've made the right decision.
Painful it is, but I wont regret choosing to delete warcraft. It boasts great entertainment and fun that cannot be describe that I really can't bear to have it destroyed. I could spend hours and hours on it and not feel tired and bored. That's the magic about games.
I'm feeling very upset now. As in...seriously. After deleting it, I will not install any other games or else all my past efforts would have come to naught. I know I'm never a pro in games (maybe just in some), but the companionship that they have gave me will not be forgotten and will be kept forever deep within the gates of my heart.
Tomorrow is 1st April, April's fool day, but what much surprises can it give? I wish it would be fun tomorrow though...
Oh well... you are already at the end my post now, where my confused feelings are overwhelming. After here, my warcraft file is officially, ended. Fullstop.
10:48 PM
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Reallity & Dreams
Can't believe
I can't believe that I started blogging a few years ago. That wasn't the unbelieveable part, the most unbelieveable part is actually that this is my 99th post after so many years of blogging or anything, whatever.
I really can't believe that this is my 4th year in HIHS, the O level year. Like many people may actually exclaim, I have the exact sentiments, my resulting is really dropping like some shit! I mean, bad as it may be, my result last year have a L1R5 of like 11... This year, it actually became like 15? Like wth?? I really feel very disappointed in myself, my grades and perhaps my attitude. This year is indefinitely a very important year as this is what will actually determine my future, or so it seems. I hate the fact that I'm scoring so badly for all my subjects and it really pains me to see my friends around me getting so many As, and me, just some noob who can't score a shit.
Well, enough with the negative comments! I think I will start to buck up my my studies and really go on to fasting- a fast from computers! Ok, maybe not fully, I still
have a life and I do not believe my willpower will enable me to make such a strong will and almost impossible decision. In regarding the studying inssue, I have decided that I will impose on myself some measures, laws and policies so that I will be able to score during O level, my ultimate goal, just for this year. The following are some of the rules I've set:
-I will delete warcraft by the end of this month (March) so that I will be able to concentrate on studying and not waste time on unneccesay things.
-I will study for every test, except for maybe some test that I'm not aware of I may actually forgo it. (Provided that I really have the time to)
- This rule are set to allow the rule mention just above to be of some use. I will pay attention to classes, lesser sleeping time in classes, pay attention during lessons (which means I would have to know the tests)
- I will sleep not later than 11.00pm for at least 2 days out of the 5 days so that I have sufficient energy to keep me awake and to be at my best form for the lesson the following day. (unless I seriously have to complete homeworks and finish studying for tests die die by that day)
So dear all, please be my eyes and be my witnesses, if I ever (like i ever will) do not comply by the laws and regulation, I would seriously be bounded to my own fines and punishments.
P.s. I will continue to use the computer to watch anime, drama and movies because I do need time to relax.
P.s.s. The law are officially in use when this month ends.
8:52 PM
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Reallity & Dreams
